Saturday, February 11, we left Oaxaca and flew into Los Angeles. On the drive back down to Ensenada, I fell silent and blocked out the excited chatter of my teammates. As I stared off into the ocean, I realized I had no words to aptly explain the wave of emotions I was feeling. Part of me was overwhelmingly happy to be finished outreach, and I was elated at the accomplishment I felt. Two months. Two months of mostly cold showers, oppressing spiritual warfare, pouring out into others, tears, more tears, joy, exhaustion, peace, bringing people to the Lord, pouring into relationships.
The other part of my heart was so crushingly sad that I cried. As people were chattering in the background, I realized how each member of Team Chewbacca has become my family. Klaus, Tony, Cory, Colton, Steph, Kiley, Jessie, Ester, Gaby, Ellie, Peta and Rheanne have really become my second family. I cried as I realized... being done means saying goodbye. I never realized it was possible to take a group of twelve strangers from seven countries... and call them family after two months of doing life together.
As a family Team Chewbacca has been through a lot. I think for everyone the Dominican Republic was difficult because the spiritual warfare was so tangible. We had several occasions when we woke up in the middle of the night and prayed together. Times where we all felt so dry that we just sat in a room and prayed for each other.. for hours. We were all devastated when Federico died. Everyone was worried when Cory got sick and couldn't fly to Oaxaca right away. I wasn't there, but I heard stories that everyone pulled together to put out the massive fire. Everyone prayed for me when I was in the hospital. As a family we saw the mountaintop, and we crashed in the valley. We saw little children in the Dominican with huge, open, gaping wounds because a witch cursed them. We pulled together as a team in the tough times, and enjoyed each other's company on our few days off. We collectively drank way too much coffee and got not enough sleep.
This chapter of my life is done. This season is coming to a close. Thursday night was our graduation and it was horribly bittersweet. Such a sense of accomplishment, such a season of growth, finished. Since then people have been trickling off to the airport and saying goodbye has been nothing short of horrendous. I surprised myself at how attached I am to my DTS family. Saying goodbye has left the biggest ache in my chest. Even writing this brings such a raw emotion. Jessie and Ester especially. You girls know that you're closer to me than I can even express. Not seeing you every day, not falling asleep to you ten feet away, not laughing with you, has made me so horribly sad. I've heard the term "post DTS depression" and laughed it off, thinking that was cute, but I now know whoever coined that phrase was not joking.
I'm currently sitting in the YWAM San Diego office. Two more of my family members are leaving this afternoon; tonight I'm picking up Michelle and we're going to hang out in Ensenada for a week. So ridiculously happy to see her, so unbelievably sad DTS is over. So glad for this season of growth and renewal in Christ.
Praise God from whom all blessings flow.
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